It happened 44 years ago. I didn’t want her to do it, I wanted to get married and join the military asap so we could have benefits for the birth. She didn’t want to burden me. I felt I had no power or ability to stop her. Despite the decision, I still greatly loved her and wanted to marry Her and still have a family in the future. (We did) two lovely, beautiful boys. But I’ve always wondered and am remorseful for what happened. Most of the time I feel forgiveness because she didn’t realize the impact and other times I’m angry that I didn’t force her not too, but I do not think I could have forced her too. It’s too late now to dwell on that possibility. She said something to the fact that it wound hold me back. I recall stating I don’t care about that, let’s get married. Didn’t happen. But my pursuit for her prevailed and we ultimately were married and had our Sons (so wonderful and fulfilling). I guess looking back deeper, because of my extreme desire for her and my continued pursuit for her and us being extremely sexually active, I have blamed myself for what happened;
That being said, I did go to confession and received absolution, but at times I still feel guilty. We have been married 42 years now. Very blessed and successful and yet, there’s a feeling of guilt lingering. In addition, there’s the fact that we may or may not be where we are if she had kept our child. Many emotions come with this state in our lives.