My Mother Coerced Me

  Joanna
Arkansas,  United States
 
 

My mother coerced me

I was 18 years old, unmarried, confused in the situation of an unwanted pregnancy. My mother coerced me into the abortion; my boyfriend (ended up being my 1st husband and father of my now 11 year old daughter) stood by me in "whatever decision I made," even though his father was an abortion provider and ended up doing the abortion (for free, of course).

A nightmare - I cried through the entire procedure - I was given a Valium, a shot of Demerol, but I was certainly wide awake and aware of everything.

It didn't seem to affect anyone but me and my baby. I had had drug problems, but they intensified. I hated myself, I felt a tremendous, staggering loss, I was angry, suicidal, guilty. I felt, and knew, that a huge part of me (and of my life) was gone.

It has been 15 years since I had the abortion - only after 10 years was I able to really come to terms with it, (or go to baby showers, hear about abortion on TV or from any other source, etc.). I wrote a booklet on my experience, strength and hope at the time and am now involved in the Pro-Life movement and P.A.S. counseling.

I would have three children instead on one. I aborted the first one, had a daughter the second time, had a tubal pregnancy at 2 months along and a [baby] died the third time, resulting in a total hysterectomy a year later due to a P.I.D. massive scar tissue in my organs. The abortion severely handicapped me emotionally for years, but I am now able to use that experience to help other women and girls not to make the same, devastating mistake that I did.

 

   
   
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