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Monique
Georgia,
United States
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At the time, I was unwed and dating someone casually. He was actually off on a trip to be introduced to someone else when I learned I was pregnant. I was also taking a drug for acne called Accutane. Despite using contraception properly, it failed. I became pregnant, and I was fully aware of the horrific birth defects my child would endure because of Accutane. My doctor pointed to abortion, giving no hope of a healthy pregnancy. All I could think about was the burden my child and I would become to society. Then I had the horrific thought of my child on earth without me if something should happen. Who would care for my severely deformed child, if he/she even lived?
The first clinic I was sent to was in a bad part of town, and the windows had bars on them. I broke down crying, knowing this was evil, and it was not medicine at all. It was something truly evil. The doctor then sent me to a more "professional" office building with tall, glass windows on the north side. My friend at the time went with me. I refused to look at the ultrasound. I was so afraid of what I would see, the mess I had created.
I do not remember much about the procedure. The doctor entered the room, quickly introduced himself, and he began anesthesia immediately. When I came to, it was awful. All I could see was psychedelic patterns of yellow, black, and white circling in a dizzying fast paced manner. I also felt I was purely in Hell for what I had just done. When I was left in my apartment that night, I was absolutely sick.
Years went by, and news on NPR raged on abortion. I became slowly depressed. I sought my Episcopal priest at the time for confession. He explained I did not have to go to him, but I could go directly to God. Somehow, I think my soul knew instinctively what my mind could not comprehend. I needed this sacrament.
Years later, my husband and I became Catholic. I encountered healing through prayer, and at one point the prayer minister asked the Lord to open my spiritual eyes and show me my angels. They were huge! But, off to the right was a young boy. It did not dawn on me until later who he was. He was my aborted son, John Michael.
Years went by. I became an NFP instructor, and I became semi-active in the pro-life movement. I began attending the Mass for the Unborn. On two occasions at these masses I had "visions" of my son. I am not sure exactly what a "vision" is, but I can say with certainty something took over my mind and imagination just a few times, so that I could experience the love and beauty of my son in heaven. The last was an image of Christ leading him to the Jordan River to baptize him. Once during a healing prayer session, I was told to ask the Lord why He sent me to earth. That was an interesting question...So, I asked, and in my mind's eye, I saw myself from a high altitude standing in a field of some grain about chest high. I was drawn closer to the image, only to realize the "grains” were children of all the same height. Later on, it occurred to me that there is an "Abortion Nation" in heaven of millions of aborted children. They are anxious for us to ask them for their prayers. Every day I ask them to pray for me, for our nation, and for every person on earth to embrace the virtue of chastity. It is my firm conviction that while the works at a government level is good, abortion will not end until the real work of evangelizing every soul with the Good News of chastity is complete.
I will always be there for every woman who ponders abortion and to guide her toward Christ. I will be there for those who decide to abort anyway, and for those who are on the other end and need support to overcome the certain depression. There is only ONE WAY, the TRUTH and LIGHT. Chastity, sex only within marriage, and no contraception is the way. The incredible gift of the explosion of light when sperm, egg and soul unite we must all grow to cherish. We are given the supreme gift of participating in creation with our Heavenly Father. I doubt there is ever another time in our eternal existence that such a privilege will be bestowed upon us. May God bless all you do. May He abundantly send His Holy Spirit to ignite this ministry and bring about His works.
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Silent No More Awareness Campaign: Reach Out - Educate - Share
www.silentnomoreawareness.org |
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