In 1973, I had a second-term abortion at Toronto General Hospital. I was 16 and my baby was around 14 weeks gestation.
While living away from my family, after our home had burned, I became pregnant as a result of being sexually violated by a young man. At the time, I was a sheltered, artistic, sensitive 15 year old, who played with dolls just 2 years prior.
I was a virgin, and planned on waiting until marriage, but was raped on the first date.
As I was a minor, my parents signed papers to consent to the abortion, and drove me to the hospital. The doctor inserted a lamineria in me to widen my cervix for the very invasive abortion scheduled 24 hours later. After the abortion, when I woke from the general anaesthetic, a nurse yanked yards of bloody packing from me.
I was sent home, and never told anyone about my horrible, shameful, dirty secret. I felt wrecked - no longer a nice girl - totally embarrassing.
My milk came in. No one told me that would happen. I cried a lot.
Twelve years later, after miscarrying a wanted baby, the horrific reality of the abortion hit me..."You murdered your baby and are going to hell." I was totally mentally and emotionally broken - suicidal.
It was then I found peace through becoming 'Born Again' through faith in Jesus. However, I still suffered much pent-up trauma over 3 decades - extreme sadness, hospitalized depressions, relational problems, and a nightmare of waking up in a hospital covered in blood - like "What just happened?"
Seldom a day goes by that I don't reflect on this dark, dehumanizing, degrading act called abortion that savagely killed my child, Abagail Rose, inside my young body - A child killed inside a child.
For me, the murder of my child has always been the trauma of my life - never the crime of rape or "non-consensual sex."
Yes, there are 2 victims in an abortion. Knowing 300 children are killed by abortion each day in Canada - the shockwaves continue. The burden I carry for the plight of our preborn babies doesn't let up.
I am thankful for all Pro-lifers, salvation in Christ - the joy strength and hope in Him - and for my beautiful family.
It is my prayer that abortion will be abolished in North America through hearts and minds changed by exposing this most horrific injustice against humanity - and that is why I am Silent No More.