I had an abortion because at the time there were no CPC's.  The only place I had to go was Planned Parenthood.  I received no information to make an informed choice.  I was asked "Am I happy to be pregnant?"  I got pregnant during my first sexual experience.  My boyfriend, at the time, when he found out of the possibility, he was nowhere to be found.  After having the pregnancy test at Planned Parenthood and having them set up an appointment for me at the clinic, I was finally able to speak with my boyfriend on the phone.  He sounded intoxicated and wasn't very supportive.  I told him that I had an appointment in three days at the clinic.  He didn't say anything one way or another.  I couldn't tell my parents for fear of rejection and disappointment.  To this day, I have not told them.  My mom is now in heaven and knows now.  My dad is 87 years old.  I know he would not understand what I did and why.  It would be very hurtful to him at this time.

The day of the abortion, I had a couple of friends drop me off at the clinic.  I felt very much a lone and scared.  I remember talking to another girl who had multiple abortions and said that it was no big deal.  I felt like it was a very big deal.

Immediately after the abortion I felt empty and in a daze.

As time went on, after the abortion, every time someone at church (the pastor, the priest,fellow church goers) mentioned abortion, I would want to climb under the pew.  I was so afraid someone would find out my big secret, my shame.  I felt like I had a big "A" on my forehead.

After I accepted the Lord, God started bringing different people in my life to help me know that I not only could forgive myself, but could find forgiveness in God.  I have gone through a post-abortion healing program called "Hope".  Working at Informed Choices, helping others through the healing process is also healing for me.