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Testimonies
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God Restored Me
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Stacy
Texas, United States
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My story began eighteen years ago. I was sixteen years old. I had supportive and loving parents and was thriving in school and in extra-curricular activities, but was longing for love and acceptance. An innocent relationship turned sexual and the next thing I knew, I was pregnant. The shame of people finding out I had sex before marriage was alarming and the idea of having a baby seemed unbearable. In my eyes, abortion was the only answer to this problem I had brought on myself. Little did I know that the decision to abort would bring about a series of problems and pain that would permeate into every area of my life for many years.
Immediately following the abortion, I was a changed person. It was like a light switch went off inside of me. I put a wall up around my heart and was full of anger. I no longer experienced the kind of joy that God desires for us. Throughout high school and college I lived a performance driven lifestyle, a life in which mediocrity was failure. Even though I wasn’t walking with God, I knew that my abortion was wrong and I feared punishment from God. It wasn’t until I graduated from college and met my husband that things started to shift.
My husband shared with me the truth about Jesus and it was then that I trusted Jesus as Lord and Savior. As a Christian, I grew in knowledge of God and His word; however, I remained in bondage. In fact, the secret I had buried so many years before was starting to resurface. The guilt, shame, self-hatred, anger, and thoughts of suicide were more intense than ever before. My marriage seemed to be falling apart and I was a mess.
A few years went by before God introduced me to a woman from my church. We just happened to connect on a deep level. It was then that I first shared my story openly. She, too, had had an abortion and was about to participate in a post-abortive recovery group. She took me by the hand and I joined the group with her. Throughout the study, I began to understand how the pain and suffering in my life was directly related to my abortion. God brought true healing. He restored me.
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