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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion
 

EXPRESS YOUR REGRET

Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously


 
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A Dark and Lonely Place
Karen
Michigan, United States

My name is Karen Porter, and I am from Warren, MI. 

My parents divorced when I was young, and I began looking of love in all the wrong places.  I drank and did drugs and, at the age of 20, found myself pregnant.  I had been with my boyfriend for almost two years, so when I told him I was pregnant I thought we would start a family.  When I traveled to Florida to see him, he told me he had made an appointment to abort the child.  I felt betrayed by this person who said he loved me.  Everything in me said to get on the next plane and head back home, but instead, to my forever regret, I kept that appointment.

I remember walking, emotionless, through the doors of the abortion clinic.  I remember that it seemed to the staff that it was just another day, just another girl, just another abortion.  But to me it was traumatizing.  I will never forget the fear that swept over me as I lay on that table, and the horrific sound from the procedure.  There really are no words for the way that I felt when I left that place, knowing that I had killed my child. 

To deaden the pain, I started partying heavily, and the relationship I was in could not withstand the emotional and psychological damage that I carried.  One night, alone and hurting, I cried out to the God, pleading that He come and show Himself to me.  Somehow, He did, and I knew He was with me.  I accepted Him wholeheartedly at age 24.  It was the beginning of love and hope in my life. 

I wish I could say it was all better then, but I can’t.  Even though I married a good, Christian man and had three amazing children, I would at times find myself in a dark and lonely place, wondering if the pain would ever truly stop.

Through Bible studies, a recovery group, and personal counseling, the healing process continued for years.  Then, while attending a pro-life event in Dallas, TX, the Lord let me know that it was time, that I was healed, that He had given me a voice, and that He was calling me to use it.  Through tears I said, “Yes, Lord, show me where, when, how, and to whom.”

In His faithfulness, He has done just that.  As I stand here today with all of you, know that Rev 12:11 is being fulfilled, that we will overcome, by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimonies, because we are Silent No More.

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