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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion


Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously

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Virginia's 2018 March for Life Testimony
Texas, United States

I became pregnant as a college student in 1980.  I was perched on the edge of adulthood, my whole life ahead of me.  I was in a new and serious relationship with a young man, and didn’t want to lose him.  I didn’t want to shame and disappoint my parents.  Those were the reasons I chose abortion. 

My abortion was on my 20th birthday. I was not prepared for the pain I would experience, and the sound of the suction machine.  I could see the suction canister on the table next to me.  When I saw my baby go into the canister, I felt like something inside me died. 

Immediately afterwards, I forced myself to shut out the reality of what had happened. I had taken care of my “problem.” Now I was going to put on a happy face and celebrate my birthday. 

Over the next thirty years, I struggled with guilt, depression, and relationship problems.    Despite being successful, I felt worthless.  No amount of accomplishment could erase the guilt.  Raising my three children, I often wondered about my aborted child.  Mother’s Days were particularly painful. 

My healing began when I heard the words of the 139th Psalm:  “You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body, and knit them together in my mother’s womb.....You saw me before I was born and scheduled each day of my life before I began to breathe.”  I received forgiveness from God and my family that same day.  I eventually attended a healing study called Surrendering the Secret.  I worked through the grief that I had suppressed for three decades. I took responsibility for my choice to abort.  Most importantly, I came to accept the freedom from the bondage of guilt that only God offers...and that is why I’m silent no more!


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