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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion
 

EXPRESS YOUR REGRET

Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously


 
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Entrusting Him to God
Valerie
Massachusetts, United States

When I was 25 and single, I got pregnant. I was afraid of my judgmental father’s reaction. My boyfriend then is now my husband of 27 years. I chose to abort out of fear of my dad and wanting a fairytale wedding, so he went along with my decision. In October of 1989, at around 6 weeks pregnant, a nurse held my hand as the masked doctor performed the surgical abortion. I thought I was just terminating “a pregnancy”!  I went on to get engaged the following June on what likely could have been the day my first child would have been born! We had the big wedding, bought a beautiful home, and had four amazing children. 

I stuffed the reality of it deep inside of me, not realizing this was the root cause of years of anger, marital problems, and turning to alcohol to numb my feelings. I carried on as if the abortion never took place. But 25 years later, the memory resurfaced with a vengeance. I decided to look up what actually happens in a surgical abortion and I could not stop crying! I’ve balled my eyes out seeing babies and toddlers in stores, on tv, or at church.

Thankfully, I was just returning to my Catholic faith at the time, so I had the Church and our Lord to lean on. I attended a Rachel’s Vineyard retreat and Surrendering the Secret Bible Study. I made lifelong friends, some of whom I traveled with to come here. I named my child David Christopher.  I’d give anything to have been able to raise him with his siblings, but I have entrusted him to God, Jesus, & Mary in heaven. I wouldn’t wish the suffering I’ve been through on anyone….and so I’m Silent No More!

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