This is my testimony:

 

I was very young Catholic and I got caught up into the whirlwind, of being in love.  I was 23 and very naive, to say the least. I was taught about murder being wrong, and I felt deep in my heart it was. What changed my heart, was my mom. She made me feel that I owed her something. Many times my dad would tell her if anything happened to me it was her fault. I was put in the position of pawn and living in their house meant I had to abide by their rules, so the spiral down began.

 

I told mom I was pregnant.  She told me an abortion was the only way, so down I plummeted. I couldn't accept the fact that I went along with this answer to my problem.

 

I still have a lot of trouble with the realization of what I did. I felt so lost and betrayed. I just kept having one after another hoping that I would get some kind of venereal disease, or  just be raped and beaten, or just die so I could be put out of this misery. To think I, a good Catholic girl, wanted to end it all. What a joke I was.

 

I ended up having 5 abortions. What a tangled web we weave. I still feel that it really was my fault, because I was weak.  I was not strong enough to combat my mom's authority, and I wasn't strong in my faith either.

 

What lies they tell. They told me they weren't babies, they were only cells. They make you believe it is the best thing to do. They say nothing about the sleepless nights and the depression, the thoughts that you aren't worthy to live since you stole those innocent lives. I know only by the grace of GOD.

 

In my early 30’s, I found a man who seemed to be Mr. Right, and conceived a son. We married and Mr. Right ended up being Mr. Wrong.  We ended in divorce. I have raised my son on my own, because his dad has mental illness.

 

Rachel’s Vineyard helped me realize how very thankful I am that I didn't take my own life, get a disease, or let all of this get the better of me. Now I am a faithful person, who opposes abortion in every way. I promised my little ones that I will work to end abortion in our country and in the world. I stand on that, and will do everything in my power to STOP IT.

 

                                   Very Thankfully Yours,

                                       A lover of life  

 

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