At the age of 21 I found myself pregnant, unmarried, and scared. I didn't want to bring shame to my family or myself. I thought abortion was the answer to my mistake. I scheduled my abortion as soon as possible because I thought if I got it done within 6 weeks or so, then it was just a clump of cells.
During the abortion procedure I was scared and nervous, knowing deep in my heart that what I was doing was wrong. The doctor asked me if I was sure that I was only 6 weeks along and I nodded yes. As soon as I heard the loud noise of the suction machine, I immediately began to cry. I felt instant regret. But it was too late. Although I felt relief immediately after the procedure, I was also ridden with guilt, shame and deep sadness.
I began looking for love in all the wrong places and became very promiscuous. I had little respect for myself and allowed others to mistreat and disrespect me. I became an angry person and had suicidal thoughts. After about 8 years of self-destructive behavior, I came to know Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I knew I was forgiven but I didn't realize I needed healing, until I heard the testimonies of several women who had been freed from the guilt and shame of their abortions.
It was then that I began my healing journey and attended a Deeper Still retreat in California. It is my desire that God will use my testimony for His glory. I want to reach those who are suffering in silence and let them know that healing and restoration is available. That God wants them to live an abundant life. That is why I choose to be Silent No More.