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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion
 

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Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously


 
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My Story of God's Mercy and Forgiveness
Erin
Arizona, United States

My story of God’s Mercy and Forgiveness goes like this: I was raised in a very typical Catholic home; Mass every week, loved by both parents. I was pretty much raised to go out and make good decisions without much guidance.
Looking back now, I realize how little self-worth I had. From the time I was 14, I was always looking for the boy who would love me. I was 19 when I met Alex. He somehow convinced me I was lucky to have him as a boyfriend and I better appreciate it. Somehow I did. For three and a half years, my life became about him. My friends and family became obsolete.

It was the winter of 1989 when I realized my period was late; a quick stop to Planned Parenthood confirmed what I already knew. Pregnant! Going to my parents was out of the question. They were already disappointed in all my recent decisions. The only thing I could think of was I had to end this and fast. I wanted no part of raising a baby and I could not bring a baby into the abuse I was suffering at the hands of my boyfriend.

The counselors at Planned Parenthood quickly scheduled an appointment and ultra-sound. While doing the ultrasound, I was told it was best to not look at the monitor, so I didn't. I was scheduled for an abortion the beginning of January.

I arrived at the clinic early in the morning I was given a brown paper bag with antibiotics and pain medication. I was ushered into a room with about 10 other women and that is where I remained until my name was called. I was quickly ushered into a room given an IV of something to make me drowsy. All I remember is the sound of sucking and talking. The next thing I know, I am in a room with the same women laying on beds some crying some throwing up. I myself began to vomit. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

As I sat on the curb of the clinic waiting for Alex to bring the car around I remember looking up and seeing a bunch of people holding signs and rosaries. I thought, you have no idea what I just went through. The months after my abortion the pain and guilt ate away at me. I was always looking at babies that would be the same age as mine. It became an obsession. I soon ended the relationship and started attending Mass. I went to confession; it was during that confession that I named my baby girl Theresa. I met and started dating the youth minister of my parish. We were married two years later; during our wedding kneeling in front of the statue of Mary my husband spiritually adopted Theresa. She is now a member of our family and our little angel in heaven. I long for the day I get to hold her and tell her how much I love her.

I know I am forgiven and have forgiven myself. I pray for the day when women no longer have to endure the pain and agony of abortion.

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