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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion


Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously

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Meeting some amazing "kindred spirits"-being obedient to God's call to share my testimony-being a voice for the voiceless -further healing -having people come up and thank me for participating in the SNMAC was quite a surprise at first but upon reflection, I consider it a privilege to take my deepest hurt to help others.




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Society Demanded me to Ignore that I ever had a Child
Washington, United States

I was 18 years old when I faced an unplanned pregnancy. The college medical facility was banned from discussing any options and was only allowed to say: “It’s your choice.” Upon hearing the news, my boyfriend of two years panicked and broke up with me. I was raised Catholic, was in college, and the only thing I knew was that I was not ready or capable of becoming a single parent. As a child-victim of sexual abuse, I had a long way to go to healthy. I was terrified, alone, and fell into the decision that would haunt the rest of my life.   

I took the only available avenue and had an abortion. It was the wrong decision for me.  While I was on the table, I was informed that I was farther along then I had thought.  Their only concern was getting more money for the procedure. I'll never forget how it felt - the tugging, the pulling.  Afterwards, I was forced to bury the memory. Society demanded me to ignore that I ever had a child and live quietly with the shame to protect their allegiance to the illusion of a woman’s right to choose.  

For almost two decades I numbed myself with alcohol and destructive relationships clinging to the idea that I had an abortion while keeping the knowledge buried that my child also suffered the abortion. I never became a mother, I never felt I deserved to be one. Over the last few years, I have broken the shackles of shame to reclaim my voice and my lost children. 

The only way I can honor the children who never were is to speak out and gently share with other women that they are not actually supporting a woman's right to choose and that I do not thank them for inadvertently protecting those who benefit from abortion on demand.  I am silent no more.


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