This is my story of God's grace, forgiveness and how I met Him at His mercy seat. I was married at the age of sixteen to get away from home. I became an adulteress. I met a man who was ten years older than I was and we kept seeing each other for years. During this time, I became pregnant with my first child. I would go on to become pregnant four more times and each time I had an abortion. I divorced my husband and married this man. What I thought was heaven turned out to be the complete opposite. After we got married, I became pregnant again and I was so happy to have this child with him. 

Instead of being excited, my husband was furious. He said he didn't want to have this child, and he wanted me to have another abortion. He already had two children from his previous marriages and wasn't interested in having more. I thought everything would be okay but, instead, my life was crumbling down.

My husband wouldn't have anything to do with me and after a few weeks I finally gave in. I was too far along in my pregnancy to have an abortion done in Alabama. I had to travel to Atlanta, and my mother came with me. It was a horrible place. I went to speak with the medical staff about the saline abortion I was scheduled to have. 

It's an inhumane procedure. It literally burns your baby. I was a wreck over this. So many mixed emotions and I was sobbing uncontrollably. I got called back to speak to someone and to give them my information. When I entered the room there was such a strange feeling in it. The woman that I was here to talk to about my procedure told me not to do this. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. This is an abortion clinic. This is how they make their blood money. 

The woman opened the blinds to her office and pointed to a dumpster and said that is where they're going to put my baby. I broke down again. The second she said that is when I knew I couldn't do this. She hugged me and told me to go back to Alabama and have my baby. That's exactly what I did. He's in his thirties now and he has been the joy of my life. There's not a doubt in my mind that the woman in that office was an angel and God put her there for a reason. I thank Him every day for that.

It took me another three years to process the grief of my abortions. The process was long and difficult. The toll that abortions take on your mind and your soul can't be measured. I'm so happy I stuck with it because I learned that I was forgiven and I was put here to help other women who might be going through the same situation. I have written a book about my journey, and I've traveled across the south sharing my story.

I wanted to share my testimony. If you know of anyone who might be struggling with an abortion, please let them know there is healing. They don't have to carry this burden alone. God is always here.

Love in Jesus,

Starr