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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion


Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously

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After sharing with others that I regret my abortion, I have been freed to live life the way God had intended, in the light and free from guilt and shame.




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Complicit by Silence
Missouri, United States

I want to speak particularly to the men, and even more particularly to the young men. I was 17 years old on January the 10th, 38 years ago, when I participated in the abortion of my son. When I learned my girlfriend was pregnant, we were stunned, and things happened very quickly. I should have been responsible enough to know better, to protect my unborn son, and the mother of my child from a horrible misguided and irreversible choice.
Today I would do anything, I would give up anything to have that choice back; to have had the courage to say, "No." Instead, I said nothing. I was afraid, and timid, complicit by my silence. Deep, deep down inside, I knew the truth. This was our baby, not just cells; but no, I said nothing, and I did nothing, but accompany her, along with her mother, to Planned Parenthood to destroy our child. During the procedure, I felt numb and helpless, and for this monumental failure, I take full responsibility.
This young lady and I somehow endured, and God blessed us with marriage 5 years later; but she suffered bouts of depression, low self-esteem, and the buried guilt of her lost motherhood. The life that had been sucked away and forgotten by everyone in her world, but never her. I now understand and believe that a woman's love for her child is stamped into her heart by God.
Her baby cannot be ripped away without devastating and permanent consequences. The wound is forever. The problem was not solved. 10 years ago, we found repentance and reconciliation through an amazing retreat program called "Rachel's Vineyard." We learned that God still loved us, and finally we were able to begin to forgive ourselves.
I want to tell all men who have participated in an abortion, or had their children aborted against their will, to let your hearts out of prison, that help and healing is available.  The pain of my lost fatherhood remained with me every day, but now through God's grace, there is unimaginable mercy and forgiveness. I live with joy and peace, and that is why I can be silent no more. Thank you, and God bless you.


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