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Cold and Calculated
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Diana
Tennessee,
United States
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By the time I was 17 years old, I had had two abortions. I was not ready to be a parent, and I didn't want to embarrass my Catholic parents. Planned Parenthood would come to our school on a regular basis. One of their counselors offered to schedule an abortion and, without my parents’ permission or knowledge, set up the appointment and got me out of school.
The clinic was in a bigger city about 50 miles away. I drove myself. The atmosphere was cold and very methodical. Young woman were lead in and out like cattle.
My sister took me to a clinic for my second abortion. It was the same, cold and calculated. I shut down and was so ashamed. It's taken me years to even remember the abortions.
I was in counseling, going through my 3rd divorce, trying to understand why my relationships ended badly. One day the counselor and I were discussing the little white crosses that the local churches would move from church to church to remember aborted babies. I told him how they made me angry. He asked why, and I couldn't tell him. He gave me a crisis pregnancy center card that had a post-abortive ministry. I thought he was crazy. What did my abortions have to do with my 3rd divorce?
I went back to work, got on the computer, and looked up post-abortion syndrome. After reading the symptoms, I realized I had 90% of them. I called and made an appointment to start the class. That was 3 years ago. I found healing and forgiveness through that program. I want to reach out to other post-abortive women to let them know that they can find their way out of this prison and be silent no more.
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