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Testimonies
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No Longer a Secret
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Nancy
Virginia,
United States
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My story begins with a history of injury from my encounters at Planned Parenthood clinics that include a blood clot in my leg from being prescribed high dose birth control pills and a torn cervix from a failed attempt to insert an IUD. Unfortunately, that didn’t prevent me from returning to Planned Parenthood in 1984.
33 years ago I made a decision I deeply regret. I was estranged from my first husband, raising two young daughters as a teacher. I wanted to protect the ones I loved from an unplanned pregnancy. The father of the baby told me, “It’s your choice what to do, but I will pay for the abortion.” Everyone I turned to told me I had to get an abortion, and I did.
Instead of the promised quick and easy fix to my situation, my abortion sent shockwaves of pain in every direction. The actual experience was brutal. I felt as though my insides were being torn apart, and I can still hear the terrible sound of the vacuum machine. The doctor poured the remains of what was my child, Robert Joseph, in the jar on a tray in front of me and yelled at me because he couldn’t find all of the body parts. I wanted to die and tried to bury the experience so it wouldn’t affect me or anyone else. But no matter how I tried I couldn’t.
I had been coerced by the PP worker to sign a release form allowing the “product of conception” to be used for scientific research. Imagine how I felt when the PP videos came out in 2015 showing what becomes of the remains of aborted children. When I saw them I wanted to die all over again. Do you know how devastating it is to know that my child’s remains were likely sold for profit? But I applaud the work of the Center for Medical Progress for exposing the TRUTH.
After my abortion I felt a period of relief then I quickly fell into a deep depression. I became self-loathing, detached from those I loved. My relationships with family and friends suffered as I distanced myself. Who could love me after what I had done? At my lowest point, when I no longer wanted to live, I discovered that God still loved me.
Mary, the Mother of Jesus, led me to Him and to healing. I sought forgiveness through the Sacrament of Reconciliation. I began praying at abortion clinics and counseling women. I went through healing programs including a Rachael’s Vineyard weekend.
But my abortion was not a quick, easy fix, and I still suffer from the decision I made so many years ago. Planned Parenthood wants women to keep the pain of abortion a secret. Please help us be Silent No More by our sharing our stories with others!
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