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Healing the Shockwaves of Abortion


Do You Regret Your Abortion or Your Lost Fatherhood? By filling in the form below you can add your expression of regret to our list. All information remains confidential and is presented anonymously

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Christina's 2020 Walk for Life Testimony
New Mexico, United States

My name is Christina.  I am from Albuquerque, NM, and I mourn my aborted sibling.

I always felt something was very incomplete when I was growing up. One day in 2013, my mother told me and my siblings that before she married my daddy, she was with someone else. The man was my half-sister's father, who pressured my mother into an abortion on January 12, 1983.

When she told my siblings and I what happened, she was in tears, in deep pain. I got up from my seat and hugged her.  I said to her, “You and my husband Ken have a common bond—the loss of a child through an abortion that was against your wish.”  I also said to her, “Mom, my sibling has forgiven you, Christ has forgiven you, and I shall also forgive.”  My mom gave my sibling her name, Gabriella. It now makes sense why she was hurting and why she blamed herself when she suffered four miscarriages. 

What brought my mom healing was a walk to Jericho Vigil, which is held every Good Friday. She saw, in a vision, my late daddy holding a beautiful little girl in his arms. They both were smiling.  I received my healing at Rachel's Vineyard Retreat in November 2018. Before I received my healing, I felt complete sadness, like a huge weight was on my shoulders. Going to the Rachel's Vineyard Retreat was an amazing blessing. The weight that was on my shoulders was taken away, the sadness and brokenness has turned into joy, and the Lord has made me whole again.  In June 2019 both my mama and I attended Rachel's Vineyard together. Her healing continued, and our relationship went from broken to healed, to a strong mother daughter relationship.

Still, having witnessed the pain that my mom suffered from her abortion and watched my husband suffer because of an abortion from a previous relationship, I didn't want any other siblings or parents to have to go through the same pain. It motivated me to be a pro-life advocate, and I am a sidewalk counselor in Albuquerque.  My sons, Aeric and Alex, and my husband Ken join me in being voices for Life outside of the abortion facilities on the sidewalk.  We have seen so many women choose life for both themselves and their babies. But there have sadly been loses, and one instance in particular deeply hurt me—the loss of Keisha and her baby Mavis. One morning, just as I was getting to the abortion clinic, a woman named Keisha was going in.  I ran from my car to the sidewalk to say, “I love you, and I am praying for you, sweetheart.  Please come and talk to me.”  She looked at me, smiled, and went into doors. Little did I know that both hers and her unborn baby girl lives would be taken by that abortion.  For a long time, I blamed myself and played the day in my head over and over. I had to go through the emotions of grieving for both Keisha & Mavis.  A year later, at the March for Life in Santa Fe, NM, I met with Keisha’s mother and sister.  We all just hugged each other and cried. I kept saying that I was so sorry.  Keisha's mother and sister both said, “Sweetheart, don't blame yourself.  It was not your fault.”  Hearing these words brought me healing. 

Our pro-life advocacy continues.  My sons know they have both a brother Jacob and an aunt in heaven waiting for us.  We love and miss them both very much. It is because of my sister Gabriella, my adopted son Jacob, my husband, sons, and the babies who can't speak up for themselves that I am Silent No More.


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