I think about my child all the time. I feel it’s a girl. I regret that I was selfish and did it to myself. Although I went to a clinic, I didn’t know that I had already killed my child by douching, but my intentions were to abort.  They told me at the clinic that they couldn’t help me and told me to see my obstetrician.  I did, and when I got the ultrasound, they said there was a problem. At that point, I knew it was my fault. 

Later in life a member of my family became pregnant and asked me about an abortion.  I regret not stopping her. I didn’t go with her, but I did nothing to stop her. So, I feel guilt for two abortions.

I spoke to a priest, who told me to continue to confess in reconciliation.  I’m not sure if that is something that is supposed to help me. I will live with this guilt forever, because as a Catholic, I have committed murder. I want others to realize the heavy heart that abortion has brought to me at 77 years old. I just want forgiveness from the Lord. And, that is why I am silent no more.