How Could You have Aborted my Big Brother? The secret heartbreak of children who've lost a sibling through abortion.
"My mom does not know I found out about her abortion. She is suffering and I want to help her but I don't know how."
Anne didn't know what to do or what to say to her mom, and her own emotions were all over the place. She went from feeling sorry for her mom, to feeling anger, confusion and even guilt for being alive.
Andrew, who had always longed for an older brother, explained his reaction to his mom telling him about an abortion in her past: "Suddenly my whole life was beginning to make sense—every desire and sadness. I had actually felt his loss in my heart throughout my life."
Actor Mark Ruffalo's Reaction to his Mom's Abortion isn't the Whole Story
Actor Mark Ruffalo's defense of his mother's abortion in December 2014 highlights the tens of millions of surviving siblings of aborted children. Many either become firmly pro-life or, like Ruffalo out of love and a desire to protect their parents are unable to give themselves permission to examine more honestly their own complex feelings and grief from the loss of their brother or sister.
Article author Theresa Bonapartis is an expert on surviving sibling issues and ministry for those who desire a deeper healing of this family loss. Theresa also shares some important points of discernment for those who are considering sharing with their minor or adult children about a previous abortion loss...MORE
Survivor guilt for siblings
Before they know what it means or can pinpoint how it affects them, sibling survivors can suffer existential guilt. They feel they shouldn't be alive when their siblings were aborted. They feel there's no purpose to life. In this audio clip, Canadian psychiatrist Dr. Philip G. Ney discusses how children know they have lost a brother or sister to abortion, even if no one ever told them, and how the damage to sibling survivors can be difficult to treat.
Siblings of People Dying in Abortions Suffer Depression
By Philip G. Ney, MD
Knowledge of the signs and symptoms of people suffering the effects of being alive when a sibling was aborted is vitally important to physicians and politicians...MORE
How Will My Abortion Affect My Other Children and Their Relationship to Me?
A mother with abortion loss answers some tough questions about facing pregnancy and parenting...MORE
Brad Mattes gives an overview of Sibling Survivor Syndrome.
We’re told it’s just a choice between a woman and her doctor. Yet, the consequences spread to the baby’s father, other family members and potentially siblings—both older and younger...MORE
POST-ABORTION SURVIVOR SYNDROME: SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS
Philip G. Ney, MD, Claudia K Sheils, RN, Marek Gajowy, MA
ABSTRACT: Clinical observations indicated that those psychiatric patients who survived when
a preborn sibling died were adversely affected by being allowed to live. It seemed being a
survivor of a pregnancy loss, particularly abortion, contributed to psychiatric illnesses. Data was
collected from a sample of 293 adults - - 98 patients and 195 counseling trainees.